Breaking Up Is Hard To Do...
 (especially when you share the same major!)
 Part I
 
PSYCHOLOGY: Girl accuses guy of just using her as a substitute
for his Mother.
 
SOCIOLOGY: Each claims to have been oppressed in the
relationship.
 
 
ARCHAEOLOGY: One tries to bury the past, and accuses the other
of trying to dig it up.
 
 THEATRE: "OH!  Life is... ENDED... as we KNOW it!"
 
 BIOLOGY: "You just wanted to get in my genes!"
 
 PHYSICS: Both resign themselves to the fact that what goes up
must come down.
 
 JOURNALISM: "Today was the end of an era.  Jack, 19, and
Jill, 18, called an end to their relationship of 2 weeks..."
 
 WOMEN'S STUDIES: "HE did it!"
 
 BUSINESS: Both decide that they're spending way too much
money together, and that it's simply cheaper to be single.
 
 HISTORY: Each party argues the breakup was caused by
something the other party did in the past.
 
 GEOGRAPHY: Both people decide to simply move far away to
avoid each other.
 
 ANATOMY: "I never liked your body anyway."
 
 ECONOMICS: One party demands more than the other can supply.

"Breaking Up Is Hard To Do..."
 Part II
 
ENGLISH: Each writes the other a perfect breakup letter,
complete with introduction, thesis, body, and conclusion, that
doesn't  really say anything substantively intelligible.
 
EDUCATION: Both concede that the relationship was a learning
experience.
 
COMPUTING: "Man, this bytes--we just couldn't interface"  
 
E. ENGINEER: "It's just so shocking... I'm sure there are
positives and negatives, but..."
 
ARCHITECTURE: "There just wasn't much to build on anyway..."
 
PHILOSOPHY: If 2 people break up in a dorm and there's no one
to witness the breakup, are they really single?
 
 
CHEMISTRY: "It was just the wrong chemistry between us..."
 
COUNSELING: Each urges the other to "Get help!"
 
MUSIC: Each utilizes an operatic lament (or, in some parts, a
country song) to express his or her sorrow.
 
LAW: They sue each other for breach of a pre-dating agreement.